Cant turn on defender, install windows updates or get rid of adware/malware-HELP

I'm almost positive that my title says it all, whatever is on this laptop, is stubborn! I'm savvy enough to get myself in trouble and have tried so many things - perhaps I've made it worse or it even more likely, just beyond my scope of knowledge.
I am unable to install windows updates- they it says failed. Malwarebytes scanned caught & quarantined, emsisoft installed, scanned- quaritined- (since uninstalled), same with eset online scanner.

When I go to a webpage, the entire page shifts down, I get blocks of flashing ads on the page and sometimes another tab opens up- according to my history it's "a.akamaihd.net redirect".

I've got complete scan logs from farbwar that I can provide, but as requested before posting here is the information on this computer.
Please Please please help..

Tech Support Guy System Info Utility version 1.0.0.2
OS Version: Microsoft Windows 8.1, 64 bit
Processor: Intel(R) Pentium(R) CPU 2127U @ 1.90GHz, Intel64 Family 6 Model 58 Stepping 9
Processor Count: 2
RAM: 3965 Mb
Graphics Card: Intel(R) HD Graphics, 2046 Mb
Hard Drives: C: Total - 463032 MB, Free - 397429 MB; Y: Total - 489 MB, Free - 192 MB;
Motherboard: Dell Inc., 0FXP6Y
Antivirus: Windows Defender, Disabled